Nightmares of a Lost Rose
by Whoviangirl01
Summary: The Doctor is used to having nightmares, but this one is different.


**Authors Note: Okay, so this is my first one-shot. Please review so I know what you think. I should probably be working in my AU, but this idea wouldn't go away, so here we go. Again, please review!**

_I need to move_

That was the first thing the Doctor thought as he shot out of his room and down the TARDIS hallway. He needed to see her, just to confirm she was still here, still with him, safe. With his superior Timelord biology and all, he didn't need a lot of sleep. Unfortunately, he did need a few hours a week and the last adventure had particularly exhausted him. Every time he slept, there were nightmares. Mostly memories from Gallifrey coming back to taunt him. Fire burning around him, children begging him to save them. This time, though, it had been different.

He lost her. Those dreams, they were so much worse than the ones he had had before. And it scared him. The Doctor was scared that one pink and yellow human could cause him this much pain. Because she made him better. He was a better man with her. She taught him to love again. He stopped when he reached her door. The Doctor stared at the door wondering if he should risk waking her. If she saw him here, he didn't know what he would do. He'd come up with something. Carefully twisting the door knob, he walked into her room. She wasn't there. He felt his breathing quicken as he looked around the room. Maybe he had already lost her. Maybe he was going mad. Before he had a complete breakdown, he felt waves of reassurance wash across his mind. Maybe she had just gone for a cuppa. That's what he needed. Forcing himself to breathe, the Doctor slowly walked out of the room and towards the kitchen. Images from his dream came back as he began to wonder if maybe they weren't just dreams.

_Calm down. I'm fine._

In truth he knew he wouldn't be. It scared him to think how much he had come to depend on this shopgirl, who had become such a brilliant person. In his dream, he couldn't save her. The Wire had taken her face and he hadn't been able to get it back.

_But I did_

He reminded himself.

"Doctor? Are you alright? Do you want a cuppa?"

"Rose." He said as he ran over to her and took her into his arms.

"It's alright. I'm here. Bad dreams?" She calmly soothed him with her voice. He had no idea what had come over him. He shouldn't be doing this. He shouldn't touch her all the time like he does. He shouldn't crave her physical contact.

_Oh, but it feels so good._

"Yes, please. I need some tea." He said as he let go. She quickly brought him a cup, and he took a sip as quickly as he could.

"Doctor, please tell me."

"Tell you what?" He asked. Oh, he knew what she wanted. He knew all too well, but he couldn't. He just couldn't tell her.

"About the dream."

_I can't._

"I lost you."

"Why?"

"Because I could save you! I just couldn't! I tried so hard. Everyone else made it. It wasn't fair! You died! And.." The Doctor yelled. He ran his hands through his already wild hair in frustration.

"But you did save me. Look, I'm right here. And, you know, I can take care of myself. I can save myself. I chose to come with you. I am promising you forever, and I don't intend on giving that up. You and me forever, yeah?" She looked at him with her eyes full of love and passion. Not pity, never pity. Why couldn't she be like everyone else? Why couldn't she just listen to what he says, and then leave as quickly as she came? Why did she care about him?

"Listen, Rose. Your forever is no where near as long as mine. You don't understand how scary it is to think you might not be able to save the person you... If you knew what I did in the past, you would hate me. I hate me. You don't..."

"Doctor, I know you have done things in the past. I have too. I've messed up pretty badly in 19 years, so I can only imagine what mistakes you could make in 900. If you want to open up to me, that's great. But I don't care what kind of man you were back then. I love who you are right now." Her cheeks heated up a bit when she saw him staring at her, wondering if he had even processed what she had just admitted. The Doctor was shocked. No one had ever said anything like that to him before. And, in that little kitchen meant for two, his walls all broke. All of his emotions flooded down on him and he bent down so he was only inches from her faces.

"Rose Tyler, I love you too." And then her lips were on his, and it was the most passionate kiss he had ever had.

I shouldn't be doing this.

His mind shouted at him, but he pushed it to the back of his mind. Right now he would enjoy this. The Doctor with Rose Tyler in the TARDIS, just as it should be.


End file.
